My Future

I've been online for a while now, browsing around Pinterest and doing other random things, but i just can't get my mind to settle down.

I got an email this week telling me I have a graduate school interview at UWF this Friday. I'm freaking out about it. I feel so off my game being out of school and doing nothing to make me a stronger applicant. I can't seem to figure out how to prepare more this time around either. I've gone over the notes I made last year when I was applying but it doesn't feel like enough.

Honestly, I feel like a big loser. All I do is work at winn-dixie. I feel like I'm wasting my time.

Ugh...anyway. When I leave work tomorrow, my mom and I are heading up to Pensacola. It's a five hour drive. That in itself is going to be stressful. I really hope it's not hard to find my way around UWF's campus.


Please God let this go well. Let me get other interviews because my heart is not at UWF

Where Do You Go From Here?

Hello Blog.

I really don't know what to say anymore. I feel like I'm in a strange funk lately. I'm not particularly sad, or particularly happy. I feel more dis-satisfied than anything.

I feel as though the root of the problem is money. I know I'm always complaining that I'm working so much, but I AM working a lot, and I'm not getting caught up on bills at all. Each time I drop below a certain amount, something happens that I have to put what I just paid and a little more back on my credit card. My student loans are creeping up on me too. It's stressful. I just really wish I could knock one bill completely out.

Speaking of student loans, graduate school application deadlines are coming. I already got an email from one school notifying everyone of the interview date to make arrangements in case they receive an interview. I'm super scared for interviews this time around. I feel like a 50 year old who goes back to college. Out of my element for a while now, not on my game.

Bleh, I'm just out of it lately I guess. I can't see where to make my situation better.

Upgrade

My puppy Apollo got neutered this Friday. It was an experience for the both of us. I really hated taking him there. He was a mess when we got into the office. He kept shaking, and growling, and just generally freaking out. The procedure was so long. I dropped him off at 7:30am and I couldn't come get him until 5pm. It was ridiculous waiting all day.

Everything went alright in the end, but he's a pitiful mess now. He's been sleeping the past two days. It's not restful sleep though. He keeps waking up and repositioning or freaking out. He makes all of these cute pitiful noises too. It's so sad. He has to wear a cone around his head for a week. Needless to say, he isn't a fan of it. I can't wait for him to start feeling better. Here are some pictures :)








I also got a new phone this week. Apollo chewed the cord for my charger for my other one. When I went into Verizon of course they were trying to get me to upgrade my phone. Turns out it was a good time to though. I needed to branch off onto my own plan. I ended up leaving with the iPhone 4s. It's pretty cool so far. I never pictured myself as iPhone owner. But whatever, Apple is taking over the world I guess.

Alive Again

I feel like Blogger is coming alive again. I like it :)

I got a new phone yesterday. It's the iPhone 4s. I'm still getting used to it. It wasn't a planned decision. It kind of just happened. I needed to branch off onto my own plan and not my mom's. Her is ending in March and she didn't want to renew with Verizon. I feel weird being an iPhone owner now. For some reason I was trying to avoid becoming a part of that group.

I'm hoping it's not taking on too much to start paying my own phone bill. Money has been tight for so long now. I guess we'll see.

Work is really busy lately. I feel like I have so much more responsibility now. Partly because of my promotion, but also because the management trust me more than the last ISC I think. I'm working 40 hours a week and I wish I could work more still.

Apollo gets neutered tomorrow. I'm really not looking forward to it. I hope he comes out alright and I hope he's not mad at me.

I work today 11-8 so I'm off to make some lunch!

Winding Road

I feel like I haven't blogged in forever. It just feels so empty on here now-a-days....


Anyway, today was a good day. I went to visit my dad. He loves seeing Apollo, so he had a great time. I did my usual when I go back home. Ate lunch, ran errands, hung out. It was nice though.

I feel like making a comment that I hope this is a glimpse of what is in store for 2012, but honestly, 2012 looks like a big black hole in my mind (no end-of-the-world pun intended). I just can't see where my future is going at all lately. I keep having this nagging feeling that I'm going to be at Winn-dixie forever. I hate that. I guess I'm nervous for graduate school decisions and where I'll live the next year. It's all just overwhelming when I start thinking about it.

I know I'm being vague, but I just have so many questions in my mind lately...

Santa Was Good To Me

This year was a really good Christmas. Not because of presents or anything like that, but it just felt good. For once all of my family were there with no struggle to get them to come. This was a big deal. It's almost impossible to get my dad to show up around the holidays. He's never feeling good. I think that was the best part. It was nice to all be together. I even brought Apollo.

The kids had a great day. They got tons of cool stuff and liked playing with Apollo. My dad was in a great mood. He loves the dog too. My sister made AMAZING food and my mom loves playing with the kids.

I feel very blessed. That's the best Christmas present I ever could have gotten.

Moving Up

I finally got a promotion at work. I had been trying to get a full time position since I graduated just for job security. I'm guaranteed hours if I'm full time. My search in the psychology field hasn't panned out, but a position finally opened up at Winn-dixie. It's full time and a pay raise. I'm pretty excited. It's still not gaining me any experience for graduate school, but whatever.

I hope this opens other doors for me.